Dating a Military Man Advice

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Being in a relationship with a member of the military can be hard. Here is some great dating a military man advice to keep in mind.

Military Dating Advice Video Transcript

how to date a military man adviceHey everybody so this is my military wife account I’m kind of just gonna share with you all about how I met Connor here’s a picture of him. and how we started dating. Tips on dating a military man. Tips on being married to one. um almost everything you can think of about living or not living with a military man or woman. First episode that I’m kind of going to do is five things. Five things you should know before dating a military man. Now I kind of want to say something I don’t want it to be mean but I think I should just say it. um if you are dating a military man just date that military man don’t marry him after two months, don’t marry him after five months, or even six months. Date him like he’s not in the military. Take military out and just date him. To often I’ve seen women, who I know, date military men and it just not be something they want or even mostly men dating women and it not being what they want them getting divorced and the divorce rates are high in the military.

Sometimes it works out if you’ve known each other before the military but a lot of the times if you know them in the military and you marry them in the military it doesn’t work out. Just because how can you know someone whenever you don’t know someone for that long. You date them for two months and then they’re about to go on deployment and so you say oh no I need to marry them now you’re doing it for selfish reasons you’re marrying them because they’re leaving maybe you want the military pay money maybe you want health insurance maybe you want I mean I don’t know who knows but you’re doing it for selfish reasons anytime you marry someone it should be purely on the fact that you love them and that you’re going to wait for them because he can be gone in two months get deployed and you should still love him whether or not you’re married to him if you loved him you would wait till you got back and then you would marry him.

I know it’s hard it’s so hard to be a military person but you you chose this life so now you have to do it you can’t just say I want to marry you now because you’re going to leave that’s not that’s not right Number one the first thing which I’ve kind of touched on is it’s gonna be hard it’s going to be really really really really really really a million times hard.

You can’t be with them all the time like a regular husband and wife you just you can’t or even girlfriend and boyfriend because there are times here in college where I see someone holding hands and I’m like wow sucks to be me because I have no one’s hand to hold but I remember that I’m so in love with Connor that a hand hold doesn’t matter because one day I’m gonna see him and it’s gonna be amazing and we’ll get to hold hands you know we’re gonna kiss or whatever um so you have to be ready for that life you have to be okay with long-distance and I was never that kind of person but the love that you have for someone kind of overwhelms that and I’m now okay with it just because I love him so much Number two you can’t always text or talk to them that’s kind of like a obvious kind of thing but you should know that before you’re going into it because as a girlfriend you want to text your BAE all the time like I love you good morning blah blah you know but there are times when I don’t get anything all day I get a good morning I text him good morning and then that’s it until six o’clock at night when he’s like hey heading home like okay cool guess we’re not talking right now cuz you’re driving which is kind of like selfish but like I want to talk to you now cuz I’ve been waiting all day um but there’s some people who you know like in the army where you can’t talk to them ever because they’re fighting for our country literally so that part is one of the hardest things to grasp because you expect when you meet them you know you either meet them in person you chat it up or you meet them online when they are not doing you know their duties or whatever and you cha-cha-cha-cha chat until they have to go back to work back to reality and it’s this whole shift of I can’t talk to you anymore so that’s one of the hardest things about being in the military for them and us it’s not we don’t get to have that constant connection or it’s a one day Skype and that’s it and so that’s that’s one of the hardest things number three this is kind of like the previous one and it’s you feel lonely all the time that’s very hard for people who live alone or you know their their wife and they live alone or the generation that we’re living in.

Because the generation that we’re living in we are all very lonely we all say that we have tons of friends and we connected so many people and we have like 500 people on Facebook and Twitter and even snapchat you know you have a picture of yourself you show people you know you think you have this a great community and what do you think about who should I call to hang out it’s like no one unless you have like a group of friends obviously um but they’re not going to be there for you all the time either and so in this generation we’ve become lonely we’ve become people who just lay down and watch Netflix and that’s okay with us because we’re feeling lonely or we just you know whatever and so the fact that we have a person who is supposed to be with us who’s supposed to cuddle with us who’s supposed to love us and not be there that’s like extreme loneliness right there but we have to work through it and as a Christian I don’t feel lonely because I have the Lord and so I’ve had to work through that constantly because I’m like the Lord is with me he is who I can turn to so I don’t have to be lonely um but I also you know still watch Netflix and all the other stuff so it helps that helps but having security and who you are is one of the biggest things you will need if you ever date marry a military man.

Number four they are dedicated men this is kind of a good thing because you want a man who’s dedicated especially to you he is going to be dedicated to you no matter what sure he there have been times where you know there aren’t such good situations going on in the home because they are gone and people are gone everything but for the most part they are dedicated and even if they do say mess up they are dedicated to fighting back what they lost as whether it’s a husband or a wife because I am from broken home and so I believe in the fight of getting back together because anybody can be redeemed anybody can be forgiven and so I think that the fight is the best part about it about a military man the fight and the dedication that they have and so if you’re in a hard relationship with a military guy or woman and there’s you know stuff going on and you don’t know how to handle it I encourage you to get support from people and I encourage you to find help because if you’re just as dedicated as he could be there’s going to be you’re going to live in a group like a fantastic marriage that’s relationship if you both just fight which I know for sure that he will if you give him the opportunity.

Number five I almost of ten five they get really stressed out really really stressed out and I know a lot of people get stressed out we all get stressed out I get stressed out to the max but Connor gets stressed out and it’s because the military puts a lot of pressure on that pressure like doing things right getting stuff done having our whole country on their shoulders to fight for. If one thing goes wrong that could be America at risk basically. It depends on what kind of job they have that measures their stress levels but I know all of them get stressed to a certain point and so I just encourage all the women to be encouragers of their men because that’s what they need they need encouragers to just say it’s okay to be there to listen to them women have to be listeners we can’t just be talkers um to you know do anything to help them with their stress give them a foot massage if you live with them give them a back massage give them anything they need to not be stressed anymore but don’t let it be unhealthy don’t let it be like I need to drink to get my stress out I need to get away from my wife to not be stressed you as a as a woman as a wife is to encourage your husband daily or your boyfriend daily um and so they’re going to be very stressed out all the time and it’s your job to not eliminate the stress, but at least kind of soothe it to make it a little bit better and trust me that will work in your favor for the rest of your life if you encourage them so that’s basically it for this video and if you have any questions leave me a comment if you want me to do a video a type of video leave a comment if you like this video give it a thumbs up if you didn’t like it give it a thumbs up um but other than that thanks for listening and love yall!

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